Do you tend to overdo “it” at the holidays?
Maybe you over-eat, over-drink, over-spend, over-scroll, over-compare, over-perfectionist. (Kind of funny, that last one…)
Do you have hangovers? Extra weight, headaches, big credit card bills or unmet expectations about how everyone was supposed to be happy and appreciate everything you do for them, dammit!
I don’t think New Year’s Resolutions would hold as much charm for us if we weren’t doing penance for our end of year holiday choices.
Let’s dig into this situation with an important caveat first.
You are the owner and operator of your mind and body.
You get to decide what to put in and on your body.
You get to decide how to manage your finances.
You get to choose who and what you say “yes” and “no” to socially and otherwise.
You know what is best for you and, well, you do you, boo.
In fact, say this out loud to yourself before we get started: I am responsible for myself and I can choose what’s right for me.
Now, your first assignment is to learn why you overdo it during the holidays, if that’s something you want to work on.
Write down all of the thoughts that you use to give yourself permission to overindulge.
Seriously, let your mind empty out. Do not edit yourself.
This is a series of thoughts in your head, nothing more and nothing less.
Next, look at what you wrote down. What do you think of those reasons? What are your opinions about what your mind offered up for consideration?
This is the chance for your inner “editor” or “critic” or “mean bully” to share everything she or he thinks about your reasons. Most of us have a critic/judge, victim, or explainer hanging out up there in our brains.
Write down what they have to say about your reasons, especially everything you “should” and “should not” be doing.
What do you observe?
Are you enjoying this time with the voices in your head?
It can boggle the mind that the human mind can have so many different opinions. It’s amazing, fascinating, curious, and sometimes frustrating, isn’t it?
Let us proceed…
Now comes the reckoning.
List out all the ways that you think and feel after the party’s over.
You overdid it.
What does overdoing it “cost” you?
So, I coach dozens of people each week, and it never ceases to amaze me how our brains operate.
In most cases, without active management, our brains think this:
“Today, we stay comfortable, have fun, and avoid danger. Carpe diem! Tomorrow we will be disciplined, organized, svelte, efficient, and perfect. But today? Not today!”
Our brains tend to believe that tomorrow we will have it together, while today we are barely getting through our to-do list.
Pace yourself as you go through this process. Take time to really see the full lifecycle of indulging too much.
The final questions for your exploration are below.
Again – no rush or pressure. Work through all of this at your own pace.
You do you, boo.
Journal using the following as prompts:
- What would you want instead?
- Instead of 100% compliance with “perfect you,” would you be delighted if you only indulged half as much as you used to? What about 20% less overdoing it?
- Would that still be an improvement? (Yes, even a 3% improvement is an improvement!)
- With that in mind, reflect on what you’d like to create this holiday season.
- What decisions can you make today about how you’ll live through the rest of the year?
- What’s the most loving thing you can do for your body, bank balance, and relationships this year?
Enjoy seeing whether this awareness leads to new decisions over the next few weeks.
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