Where are you right now?
Physically. Logistically. Financially. Socially.
This article is not about accepting who you are but where you are.
I coach people from their 20s to their 70s.
I hear the spectrum of discontent from “I should know where I’m going” to “I should have taken another path.”
Or…“I need to make the right decision…(or I’ll have ceaseless regret!)”
And… “I should have made a different decision. Because that career/partner/house/town would definitely have made me happier!”
One of my favorite coaching techniques is my Coach Lisa reset:
So…this is happening…
That first part is such a stress diffuser because, well, wherever you go, there you are and you can powerfully move forward when you accept your starting place.
There are no right or wrong decisions, just decisions you later might label that way.
There are no undo buttons, not really.
Every crossroads is an invitation.
Every lesson learned is an opportunity to apply those lessons as you try, try again.
The days you’ve already lived have erased behind you like footprints in the sand being softened away by ocean waves.
The days ahead of you are mirages, never real.
What you have…only, ever, and always…is now.
So. What’s happening for you?
Write down the first unedited thought and feeling you have about each of these life areas:
- Romantic relationships
- Family relationships
- Career / Business
- Personal Development
- Fun / Play
- Self-Love / Self-Compassion
What do you see in that list of thoughts?
It’s possible you could see appreciation, judgment, longing or desire, sadness or disappointment.
And…no matter your answer…can you accept what you are thinking and feeling today just for what it is?
Each one of your answers offers you information.
Now what do you want to do with that information?
Do you want to make it mean something about you, your identity, how you see yourself? You can, of course, yet know that the meaning making part may not always serve what you want to create. Get curious about that.
Do you want to observe these responses with curiosity, like a scientist enjoying the thrill of experimentation and discovery?
Would you like to learn? Pivot?
Maybe this activity causes you to think of new sentences.
“I am so out of shape!” could become “I can take care of this body starting today. I think I’ll do yoga this afternoon.”
“I married the wrong person!” could become “This is who I am married to. What kind of partner will I be…just for today?”
“I am so ashamed of my debt!” could become “These are today’s numbers. Would I like to take a small action for my financial future today?”
Accept first, and you’re better able to connect to the powerful decision making part of your mind.
Judgment and avoidance steal power from today…and what you could create for your future.
P.S. I invite you to fall in love with the “Less Stress, More Fun” podcast. Subscribe today! Each week’s episodes offer smart, fun ideas to reduce stress and boost your sense of playfulness.